Every maid of honour I speak to arrives with the same look: a group chat with 47 unread messages, a spreadsheet nobody else has opened, and rising panic. So here is the thing I always say first – the checklist that actually matters fits on a beer mat. Date. Budget. House. One activity. One big dinner. Everything else is decoration.
Start earlier than feels sensible
Butlers in the Buff’s booking records – 100,000+ groups over 25 years – put the median booking lead time at 82 days, with the most organised groups locking things in 11–14 months out. And there is a rush hour: 56% of their bookings land between January and May, with January the single busiest booking month. If your hen is in peak season and you start planning eight weeks out, you are shopping in the sale rail. The good houses and the good suppliers go first.
The beer mat, expanded slightly
Date: get the bride’s non-negotiables, offer the group two options, take the majority, close the vote in 72 hours. Budget: agree the per-person ceiling before anyone books anything. House: with the typical hen group at 13 (GoHen, 2025–26), a private hen party house beats juggling five hotel rooms – and our questions to ask before booking guide covers the unglamorous checks. One activity, one dinner: resist the urge to schedule every hour. The best bits of every hen happen in the gaps.
What did not make the beer mat: matching sashes, a 14-item itinerary, and any game that requires a laminator. If they happen, lovely. None of them will be what the bride remembers.
My honest tip: appoint a deputy on day one. Not to share the glory – to chase the three people who never pay their deposit. Every group of 13 has three of them, and the organiser should not spend the hen being a debt collector.
Frequently Asked Questions
The very first step is confirming the bride's wishes — what kind of weekend she wants, who she wants there, and any preferences for destination or activities. Once you know this, you can set a budget, choose a date, and start looking at venues. Book accommodation first as the best properties go fast.
Ideally 4–6 months in advance, especially for popular destinations and peak weekends (spring bank holidays, summer). Popular hen party houses book up very quickly. Start with the date and accommodation, then finalise activities, food, and itinerary closer to the time.
Create a WhatsApp group or shared document with all the key details — dates, location, costs, and payment deadlines. Send a single clear message with all the information rather than drip-feeding it. Use Splitwise or similar to track who has paid and who owes what.
A typical hen party weekend includes accommodation (usually a group holiday house), one or two planned activities (cocktail making, life drawing, spa treatments, etc.), a group dinner or private chef experience, and evenings in at the house or out at local bars. Decorations, sashes, and personalised touches are popular extras.
Communicate clearly in advance which parts of the weekend are 'must attend' versus optional. For accommodation costs, charge only for the nights each person stays. For activities and meals, collect money per-person for each element separately. Flexibility and clear communication prevent most issues.
